Portland Update

Worlds reunited at the bar last night as old friends M and S and I met up with all three members of the Mclan at Beulahland on Belmont. J and K were in town visiting E and J, M, S and I all used to be do-gooders together back in the day. The bar offered PBR in a can, a bottle and on tap though was generous with the Jameson. Hipster dude spinning hiphop at the front of the room. I am hungover though there is talk of brunch and then a walk somewhere in the Colombia Gorge. Still no progress on the Portland Project idea front, despite this creative entry from my sister:

Regarding your request for feedback on what "creative" thing to do while in Portland, here is my idea: POO DOLLAR. Put poo on a dollar - put it on the street and hide behind a tree with a video camera. Nuff said.

Indeed.

Dream, 1/25

As written upon waking up at 8:30 PST yesterday morning:

Sitting at desk in office when approaced by Sen. John Edwards. Introduced. Begins speaking of possible place for me in his campaign.

"What kind of people live in Nevada/new Mexico?" His eyebrow is raised.

"Latino...er, Spanish?"

Wants to know if I'd be interested in pitching his renewable energy plan to Latinos in Southwest.

I leave office and wander long hallways to get outside and get back to my car. Get to car, realize I forgot my shoes under office desk and my socks have holes in them. Walk back to office.

Myr of Hbkn Dave Roberts is now there reclining on chair speaking with Sen. Edwards.

"Dave Roberts!" Embarrassed for being too casual

"Ben...." he doesn't remember my last name

"...Mayor Roberts, how are you?" More formal now.

Barack Obama is now sitting at the desk I was at. I say excuse me and look under desk and find my shoes and put them on. Obama gets up and I help him with his jacket

"Can I help you with that, Senator?"

"Thank you Sir" as he hands me his discarded undershirt. Feel embarassed to be so obviously more respectful to Obama in front of Edwards. Edwards and I admire Sen. Obama's undershirt: white with ABA All-Star logo, has holograms of cities' names, big hoop and net and the face of some smiling dude in the middle.

The Portland Project

So I flew in to Portland, OR last night for a West Coast variation on my East Coast vacation. While I'm out here I've been thinking that it might be fun to do some sort of project/artsy thing as a sort of time capsule for the trip. The problem is that it seems I am seriously lacking creativity.

My ideas, to date, in ascending order of stupidity:

1. Compete against the Portland Trailblazers in Free Throws. As in, go to a park every day with the box score of last night's game and attempt to shoot a better FT percentage than the Blazers did as a team the previous night. STUPID SCALE RATING: TWO OUT OF FIVE

2. Visit the same downtown Portland intersection at the same time everyday and ask a stranger to answer a seemingly innocent question but that when compiled into a string of video clips offers illuminating commentary on Portland and the human response to being accosted by inquisitive strangers. STUPID SCALE RATING: THREE OUT OF FIVE

3. Visit the same downtown Portland intersection at the same time everyday and scream "MOO!!!" as loud as I can. Document same as above. STUPID SCALE RATING: UNMENTIONABLE.

That's what I got. While I'm sure all of these ideas this would make for exceptionally stimulating video and text commentary, I'm not sold on any of them. So whoever any of you are that read this thing, please feel free to hit me up with any ideas you'd like to see me try to pull off. I'm wide open.

In other news...

1. We'll have our 2008 Democratic presidential nominee about this time next year, making the general election about TEN MONTHS LONG!!! Good for 24/7 cable news networks, bad for candidates, voters and republican democracy in general.

2. In related free throw shooting news, Jason Kidd used to blow kisses to his wife as part of his pre-free throw routine. Since Jason's divorce, his message to his wife seems to have changed:


3. FILE UNDER "Devestatingly Too Little, Too Late, Though Apparently Sooner Than We Think": For those keeping score at home, this week's State of the Union address marked the first time that our President has used the words "global warming" or "global climate change" in the speech. Unfortunately, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change adds lube to the slippery slope.

LASTLY: ALERT TO PHILLY HEADS: Caps and Jones playing Haverford TONIGHT - warm yourselves up some with these two cool dudes whose musical flow is best described as pyroclastic.

Introducing...Delonte West

Delonte West plays guard for the Boston Celtics. Weird dude.

Exhibit A: His description of his ideal Valentine's Day date.

Exhibit B: The WY-AA HANG-AAA!

BIG THINGS

New Years Swag.

YO.

On with the new year and whatnot...

Joe Rogan, there's something you should know about me...

It's Ball Season for me. Before the 2006 pack of newly elected swine can get to work bellying up to the trough, they must throw parties for 15,000 of their closest friends and enemies and I love bearing witness.

Got a few more bashes to attend where I will join my fellow unemployed campaign operatives in crowding out the amateurs from the Open Bar. Also on tap this week: inquiring about work. 2007. BIG THINGS - let's do it!

Some Links:

1. Malcolm Gladwell's insightful New Yorker piece on puzzles, mysteries, Enron and Nazi propaganda. Really interesting and everyone I try to talk to about it seems to have already read it so quit slacking and join the convo.

2. Requiem for the Skins: The WaPo delivers three terrific stories as a post-mortem on this disappointing season for the Potomac Basin Indigenous Peoples. Excellent reporting, unusual levels of candor from players and coaches. An interesting read for any sports fan. Parts One, Two, and Three found here.

3. The winner of MC Serch's next reality show wins a pack of Newports and Puma sweats. Make sure to click the "Gas Face" video for some old school Flavor Flav, Gilbert Gottfriend and proof that hip-hop used to be goofy AND STILL good as hell.

4. Gilbert Arenas aka Black President aka Agent Zero has been getting loads of ink. In case, you missed it, the "walk-away" shot as seen from the nosebleeds: